we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
its liver damage thursday
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize