i think i have two assholes
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Randomize
