i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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