You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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