called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize