Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
COCAINE IS GR8
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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