i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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