I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
