Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
