It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize
