Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Help me help you realize you are a moron
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
