You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize