check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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