If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize