since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
