i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize