office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
