Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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