you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
