whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
