i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Randomize
