I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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