I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
