awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
my poor anus
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Randomize
