I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize