I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
