i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
