This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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