do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
A+ Viking dick
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
