in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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