We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
