the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
