Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
