i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Randomize
