As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
