well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
