Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
