after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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