Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
