Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
