Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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