You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
