I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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