Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday

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(972): View more from Texas

So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.

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(630): View more from Illinois

i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can

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(786): View more from Florida

What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?

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(641): View more from Iowa

yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.

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(520): View more from Arizona

One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"

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(310): View more from California

That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering

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