So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i will never coherently bang her
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
