The police scanner is talking about you again....
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
