I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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