she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
