:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
