the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
