I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
